Half a Year Home

6 months.

It's been 6 months since we scooped up a tiny little girl on the other side of the world and promised to love her for always.

Sometimes I look at the pictures of before we adopted her, right after we adopted her, and now and cannot believe how she's changed.

The referral picture - the very first time we saw her sweet face.

Right after her heart surgery in Shanghai (July 8). She looked so forlorn and alone. Her face haunted me when I tried to sleep at night. I would whisper to her "We're almost there, Tali. We're almost there."

One of the last pictures we got before we left for China. This was the end of July.

When we first met her, I was struck by how little she was, how frail. She couldn't walk or stand on her own at 21 months. She gorged on food if we didn't parcel out the noodles or fruit or whatever. She loved tentatively.

Oh how Talitha Ruby has grown. We've watched her transform from a thin baby who guarded her heart so fiercely to a toddler - a little girl! - who runs on her almost chubby legs to the arms of a parent, a brother, a sister, where a hug and kiss is reciprocated with laughter. 

The first few months were a big learning curve, much like bringing home your first newborn. I never ever knew if I was doing anything right but prayed that God would fill in the gaps of my parenting. There have been a lot of struggles with attachment and putting love into action even when the emotion is not there. Sometimes it's so real and so right and she reaches up to pat my face or kisses me with her eyes closed tight with anticipation. Sometimes it's not. It just isn't. But everyday I make the choice, over and over and over again, to love. To mother. To be present.

The last few months have still been difficult but there is so much sweetness, so many moments where it is obvious that she has chosen to love us. To be a daughter and sister. She engages us, she grabs our faces and demands we look her in the eyes and connect. She smiles and scowls, she throws fits and gives long hugs and pats on the back. 

The last three pictures were taken today - I wanted to have the most recent pictures for her 6 month update. Yes, they were taken in the bathroom while Noah sat on the potty and made random observations in an attempt to get out of peeing.

I can see that Talitha's changed a lot over the past 6 months but these next two pictures were really astounding. Noah has changed too, of course. But Tali? A different person.

The week we came home, September 2013

Six months home, February 2014

And for the next 6 months and then rest of our lives together? I can't hardly wait.