Without further ado, this post of unrelated topics.
Jeans
What is going on with jeans today? For starters, it seems like the general population has moved away from basic, $30 jeans at Target or Old Navy. Fashionable people today think nothing of plunking down their credit card for a pair of jeans that cost over $100. That's like 3 pairs of normal jeans. Not only that, they all look like a 12 year old designed them with a bedazzler. Horseshoes, fleurs-de-lis, skulls, the face of Elvis - all are rhinestoned to the back of jeans (you can bet your sweet bippy that I googled the plural of fleur-de-lis). Some of my girlfriends (sounds so fun when said like that, doesn't it? Slumber parties and lip gloss abound!) have told me that it's an investment. An investment in what, may I ask?
That's not the worst part. Men's jeans have become just as ridiculous. There is no way you can defend this pair of jeans. Don't even try.
It looks like a unicorn on the bottom right and, oh I don't know, the wheels of an upturned covered wagon on the left?
Matt asked me recently to find him some more jeans. He probably bought his current pairs in 1997. At Walmart. They're Waljeans. He doesn't even care enough to pick out his own jeans. He's too busy changing oil and hammering pieces of wood together. In short, he's a man. He gave me his measurements and said "I don't care, just find some. Maybe try Ebay." This is a step up from a guy who used to shop for clothes at Goodwill (and not in the hipster way). Another plaid shirt? Score!
But even Ebay is not safe. A lot of jeans in his size are either skinny or have manufactured bleach stains or rips or hurt your eyes with the shine of a thousand sparkles. If I bought Matt a pair of those jeans, he would either laugh or ask bluntly "Why do you hate me?"
Guests
We recently had a guest over for dinner. He and his wife are also adopting from China and are leaving quite soon. He and Matt went to high school together so it was fun to catch up. While the men were getting coffee, Matt asked our guest how he took his coffee. He said "Cream or milk if you have it. Sweetner/sugar would be nice." During the course of the conversation, Matt remarked that he took his coffee black. Without thinking, I said quietly "Like a man." Our guest sputtered on his coffee and asked if I was making fun of him. Actually, yes, yes I was. Let's be honest - it's fun.
Exercise
I'm trying to do Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. I'm at the point in the video where I suddenly remember that I hate it. The other day I was in the middle of a beating when Jack bounds into the room excitedly exclaiming "I love this exercise!" Then he proceeds to join me saying "This is easier for me because I'm stronger than you, I'm younger, and I'm skinnier."
Meanwhile I scold, between gasps "There's no talking during plank jacks! And also, I can still take you down. Maybe not physically but intellectually. Don't roll your eyes at me! And at least could you try to act like this is hard? You know what? Just go. Go run around the house 17 times. And I don't want to hear about your resting heart rate or no snack today."
Math
What would a post be without an update on Statistics? The last class our teacher flat out told us that most of us, if not all, will not use this material ever again. She said that it must be taught as some people go onto a career in Statistics. So I raised my hand and said "Why don't we take a poll on our career intentions? If all of us plan on non-mathematics careers, can we skip some of this stuff? We could make pie charts from our poll." She chuckled and continued teaching. Nothing irks me more than people assuming I'm being sarcastic when I'm quite serious.
(I read this post aloud to Matt and at the end he said "Our poor kids. Someday they're going to read this and think 'What was wrong with my mom?'")
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