Random Ramblings

Vaseline

Those of you who have read my blog know about the unique relationship Noah has with Vaseline. This boy loves the feel of it and the dapper effect it has on his luxurious mane:

We had another Vaseline incident recently. You might be wondering why I still buy it. Probably the most relevant answer is that I'm not the brightest bulb in the...wait, what is the end of that? Package of bulbs? Multi-light ceiling fan? Whatever. The point is I'm not it. My lips get really dry and cracked and Vaseline is the best thing for them. I have to carry lip gloss in my purse and my scrubs pocket at work. If I forget it at work, I have to rely on a little tube of lanolin in my work bag that's left over from my breastfeeding days. The problem with lanolin is it looks like I've just dipped my lips in Crisco. Plus, it's probably unsettling for patients. They're telling me their story of congestive heart failure and I'm slathering my lips with a tube labeled 'Mother Mabel's Nipple Ointment' or something.

Anyway,  I recently picked up another container of Vaseline and when I opened it, I realized it was the baby powder scent. I've done this before. I buy the container labeled "fresh," thinking that it smells like a meadow or a light spring rain, only to find it smells like baby powder. If I slather my lips with it, my face smells like a clean baby butt all day and I'm just not crazy about it. Not wanting to waste my $2 jar of Wal-line, I put it in Noah's room for diaper ointment. He got into it and shared the joy with Talitha. This time he didn't put it into his hair, but came to me with a handful of it to show me. He's growing up, I suppose.

All the Pretty People

A couple days ago I ran to Walmart with all four of the youngins. I planned on picking up a box of hair dye so my hair was pulled back into a greasy ponytail (hair can't be freshly washed when dyed). But it's Walmart so no matter, right? You can safely assume that I ran into approximately 41 people, all of whom wanted to see Tali and chat, which meant lots of direct eye contact with me. And wouldn't you know it, I run into a very pretty friend of mine. Clothes all nice (like clean and stuff), tasteful jewelry, hair perfectly highlighted.

There she was, all sparkling.

There I was, hair all greasy. I haven't found my tweezers since China so I look like the car wash guy from Breaking Bad.

That was a fun time.

Later that day I did something monumentally stupid. I poured the little container that comes in the hair dye box into the big one with the applicator tip. I applied it to my hair, waited the obligatory 30 minutes and rinsed it out. As I was rinsing it out, I realized that there was no color. That's right, I didn't put the color into the applicator bottle.

While I was sitting on the bed with Tali, waiting for my freshly not dyed hair to dry, Noah came over with a container of deodorant. He asked "Arm?" I nodded and he began to gently coat my entire arm with the deodorant. My hair might be grey but gosh darn it, my left arm smelled pretty darn good.

The Days Are Full

I'm still trying to find the balance in my days. I have to homeschool and keep the house clean (and by clean, I mean not eligible for an episode of Hoarders, at least not the first round of call-backs), I have to keep up with my Bachelor of Nursing classes and figure out what Tali needs from me. Everyday I make sure I spend time interacting with her, being near her. She feels so much safer if I'm nearby and she's able to come back to me. Her legs are getting enough fat on them that I'm able to squish them, which is just lovely. At least a couple times a day, I pick her up and hold her close. I kiss her cheek and leave my lips there for awhile. I can feel her body relax and her heartbeat slow down. She keeps her face next to mine for minutes at a time. It's unusual for a child that age to want to be held that long. She wants to be held by her mom like only a child who has experienced life without one does. I just hold her and hold her and hold her. Sometimes she will sigh and I know it is a sigh of contentment and it feels like my heart is going to burst with joy for her. She knows. She knows she is safe with me, with us. Today she hooked her little arm around my neck and laid her head down on my shoulder. It was such a small but monumental step and I couldn't stop the tears from falling on her sweet little head.

In less sentimental news, the days are filled with two toddlers. Like twins, I imagine. Except one is new and vulnerable and one is basically the size of King Kong. Sometimes Noah will see her sitting nicely and slowly push her over. This is followed by an emphatic "Uh Oh!"

Like he cares.

Often they will irritate each other to the point of tears and it's such a ridiculous thing that all I can do is laugh. Through my tears.

An Open Letter to Talitha's Birthmother

To my daughter's mother:

I have started this letter many times but have lacked the courage to finish it. The odds of you ever reading this letter or meeting us in person is slim, I know. But there are things I must tell you, things you must know.

I want to thank you - so much - for choosing life for Talitha. I don't know the circumstances you faced two years ago or the circumstances you face still. It would have been easier for you, in some ways, to end her life. But you didn't. You chose to let that sweet little girl draw her first breath. You held her and fed her and probably watched with terror as she turned blue when she cried. There was a moment when you realized that something was wrong. There was a moment when you made the decision to give her away to save her life. On the other side of the world, I made the decision to raise your daughter as my own.

You have my eternal gratitude for giving her life, for leaving her in a safe place so that I might find her one day. I look at my sweet little girl and think about you. When she is all grown up someday I will wonder if perhaps there isn't a woman in China that walks the same way, that laughs the same way. I promise to tell her about your sacrifice and that you did it out of love for her, out of hope for a better life for a sick little girl.

Life is difficult. When we are born it is like a game of roulette and some are born with plenty, some are born with nothing at all but the breath in their lungs. I grew up reading stories about strong women and I was told that it was ok to be fierce and funny and speak my mind. It has been different for you, I know. Women live in the shadows in places all over the world. Not able to read, not able to be free, not able to hold their children, not able to control their own destiny. But now your daughter, my daughter, can live in the light. And now she can be fierce and funny and speak her mind too. You have given her a great gift, my friend.

Life is also a many splendored thing. This little girl is safe and warm and healthy and loved - because of you.

There is a proverb that states that women hold up half the sky. When you get tired, I will be ready on the other side of the world. And I will hold up your half. And when our daughter is grown and ready to take her place in the world, I will show her how to hold up the sky with her strong, strong arms.

With love and hope for those in the shadows,

Your daughter's mother

Random Ramblings and What We're Learning

First off, your dose of random ramblings:

Hashtags

I think everyone has the friend or two guilty of excessive use of hashtags. You know the ones. They're making dessert and their post reads like this:

Making cookies! #chocolate#chip#oven#350#for#10#minutes#memories#batter#spatula#milk#yummy#pauladeeneatyourheartout#nestle#bettycrocker#burnedmyfinger#ouch#coldwater#stillhurts#bandaid

Seems like a bit much to me. I don't use twitter but now that it's everywhere, I can't help but think in hashtags. I don't even know exactly how they work but I'll be at Walmart and think things like #crowded#nolanesopen#friedchicken#noPublix#inpajamas#peopleofwalmart#lowprices#thisscooterhasscabies

Things like that. Not sure what it means but it's probably nothing good.

Car Decals

We live in a southern town that is rife with y'alls and hunting. These decals are all over:



I swear I thought it was a person on fire that was dancing. Imagine the snout (or muzzle?) as the person's right arm bent at the waist, hips jutted out in a saucy manner, hair aflame. I can only assume that he or she is listening to Gloria Estefan or something. (If you, like me, only saw the people on fire...this is a deer head)

Then I saw this decal and thought "Aw, two people dancing together, heads aflame."




My Girl

This is my 6 year old, reading the Children's Illustrated version of Oliver Twist. She reads and reads and reads. She is my girl indeed. I asked her what the story was about, just to make sure she was understanding it. She told me a sad tale of a boy whose mother died and he lives with people who are mean to him. He has only two people who are nice to him and Oliver is concerned that if something happens to those people, he will be stuck with the mean ones. I told her to carry on.

What We Are Learning

Adoption is hard. Really, really hard. But that's a whole different post. It's extra tricky when you homeschool. There is no break during the day when the older ones skip off to school (we have segregated the kids in olders and littles, thus pitting them against each other for life). Our last year of homeschool has basically gone to seed. Lots of movies, lots of "Please be quiet! I'm on the phone with Department of State!" type days. Now that we're back I'm dealing with dueling toddlers and a sweet little girl who frets when I'm out of sight, afraid that I have left her as all the other adults before me have. We're supposed to be learning about the Middle Ages but all we've done recently is watch "A Knight's Tale." I'm checking it off anyway, even if it means that when the kids play knights, they chant "We will, we will, rock you!" It's nothing if not authentic.

There are so many evenings when I think "A whole day has gone by and we haven't learned anything." But I have to hold on tight to God and trust him that they will be ok. And as I watch my kids throughout the day, I realize they are learning. Nothing that will be on a test - but nothing that truly matters usually is.

Talitha is learning that she can trust us. That we are family and we are permanent and it's ok to be sad or stressed because we will be here to hold her. She is learning that we will be there every morning when she wakes up. She is learning that a mama kisses and rocks and reads silly books and gets her bottles of milk because that's what a mama does. Always. At this point she still eats and eats and eats like every meal could be the last. She is learning, one day at a time, that she will not go hungry here. Through the years she may grieve for her past and I will there, holding her tight and kissing her cheek while she cries. Everyday her trustbank grows a little bit more until one day it will be full and she will know she is forever safe.

Jack and Kate are learning that there are things in life that are worth fighting for, worth sacrificing for (and yes, I know you shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition. But that's not important right now). They are learning that money is just money after all and that a child's life is more important than the slew of nice things we could buy instead. Sometimes Jack will tell me that he wants to provide heart surgeries for free for kids like his sister. And then when Noah gets upset with Talitha over a toy, Kate will quickly tell him "No, no, sweetie, we are nice to babies. We love babies." And I know that they are learning after all.

Settling In and Small Talk

Talitha is settling in pretty well here. We went to church today and she let another woman hold her for awhile then happily came to me (although I did have food so it's hard to say she really wanted me). Later in the service I took her to the nursery. My friend's daughter sat across from me on the floor and held up her hand and asked Tali for a high five. Tali slowly raised her leg and tapped the girl's hand with her foot. Sense of humor, this one.

Tonight we stayed up awhile watching cartoons since Noah had a fever. Tali laid on my shoulder after her bottle of milk. After about 10 minutes she turned to everyone and waved goodbye. She wanted to sleep. She really sleeps well, in her crib in the room she shares with Kate. She sleeps well for her afternoon nap and sleeps through the night. Hooray!


Random Thoughts: Today I was at a birthday party and was making small conversation with another woman over the Cheetos (Cheetoes?). She told me everything was going well and she can't complain. People say this all the time and it makes me feel sad. I think they're just not trying hard enough. So sometimes I'll help them out -

"How about your shoes? Did you wear those on purpose?"

"You know, your face isn't symmetrical. There's something to complain about."

It just saddens me when people give up so easily. Of course you can complain - you just have to put your mind to it.

Cardiology Appointment

Tali had her first cardiology appointment yesterday. We were cautiously optimistic, as China told us that the surgery was successful and nothing more needed to be done. But the report was all Cantonese to us so what did we know? We got to meet the lovely and amazing Dr. Lacey, after all these months of communication. This was the doctor who spent many an email explaining Talitha's referral, doling out advice and making appropriate "She's so adorable!" statements. We weren't even her patients yet and still she spent so much time with us. She rushed in at the beginning of the appointment, before the basic check-up had even begun, just because she wanted to see the famous Tali.

Jack played with a model of a heart with defects and an occluder. He was happy to place and replace the occluder with his eyes closed.

She grabbed a diagram of the heart and explained what exactly the surgery accomplished. We were told an occluder was placed at the site of the PDA but it was actually placed at the VSD, the hole between her ventricles. The PDA (a shunt between the aorta and the pulmonary artery that normally closes at birth) is still there but very small. She has a couple of leaky valves but they are not troublesome. Dr. Lacey was really impressed with the surgery and told us we needn't be cautiously optimistic - outright hopeful is what we are! She will still need to be on aspirin for 6 month to prevent clots in the occluder.

Little Miss has gained about a pound since she's been with us - no surprise (have you seen me and Noah?). She now tips the scales at 16.2 lb. Every day she is changing. Getting more animated - laughing, waving, pushing back at Noah. She will rule the roost soon. 

Between Noah and Tali, I was up about 4 times last night. You know those moments when you should be sleeping and your mind is all foggy? I would think "Why are there two tiny humans crying?" It was like toddlers in stereo. 

Noah is also strolling into the girls' room while Tali is sleeping and waking her up by calling "Tali? Tali?" Then he will come back out as she cries and say to me "Uh oh." 

It's real fun.

Random Stuff

Have you ever thought of something good after the fact? It's terrible. Ever since my dried penis post (don't act like you forgot it), I've been kicking myself. Why did I say 'manhood stew' when 'genital gazpacho' would have been so much better? Embarrassingly, I've thought of it everyday. Perhaps it's a chemical imbalance, I don't know.

Today at the store, the cashier pointed to Tali and asked how old the little one was. I said "21 months, she'll be 2 in December." She cocked her head and gave me a look like I was purposely spreading lies about my child's age. She said "This baby?" No, the one behind her...

We have these nice heavy lamp that we got as a wedding gift years ago. We had to replace the shades over the years. It originally came with a metal frame for around the lightbulb and a metal thing that twists on top but they have since been lost or used to poke a sibling in the eye or something. The last shade we had just rested under the bulb but we could never keep it level. So I decided to go with a smaller shade. I apparently grossly misjudge size (like I do distance) and now my lamp looks like a headshrinker lamp:

Finally, a couple pictures of the kids on the floats we got in China. No real reason, it's just always good to end a blog with adorable pictures so people can forget all the stupid things you've written.

Talitha Makes 6

It's been a pretty good couple of days, just getting to know each other and figuring out this family of 6.

We had a lovely surprise upon coming home. Some friends left gifts and made banners. This is a girl who is loved and accepted and it shows.

The house was very clean, mother-in-law clean in fact. Matt's face was alight with the happiness of a thousand dreams as he took in the cleanliness of the house. I punched him a little.

We made it to sleep around 2 am, some 30 hours after we woke up. Yesterday was a little blurry as jet lag wrapped all my thoughts in fondant. Today is a little better, not much. Matt, Jack, and I were all up at 4 am. Matt and I mowed the lawn and swam in the pool at the height of the sunshine today, trying to stay awake and reset our clocks.

My parents brought Kate and Noah over yesterday evening. Oh how I missed them! Noah was huge and heavy and seemed to blossom into saying little sentences overnight. The countless treats at both grandparents' house were apparent as we struggled to lift him up. Katie hugged us tightly then happily went off to meet her sister. Matt's parents and my parents were over. There was cake and a balloon and presents- welcome to the family, sweet girl!

Talitha fell asleep in the playpen in our room without too much fuss but woke up a little after midnight. As I held her, I noticed she kept looking around and seemed very scared, as if the unfamiliar surrounds were too much late at night. She finished off the night between us in bed, one hand up by Matt's face, one foot on my back.

This morning Matt ran errands with Kate and I got to see how Noah and Talitha interacted. There was a little snatching of toys and a vehement "Mine!" from Noah, a little snatching of toys by Tali and a wee bit of sharing. Noah spent a lot of time today pointing at Tali or petting her hair and saying "Black hair?" Tali will take petting from anyone but Noah. She makes a little squeal of irritation. It's going to be interesting with these two. Noah is five months older than Tali so for half a year, they will be the same age.

He is 26 months, she is 21. She weighs 15 lbs to his 25 lb.

He was not happy about not being able to get into the Johnny Jump-Up. He pouted in the girls' room for awhile and then we found him in it a few minutes later. Nice try, Sumo.

Overall, she's adjusting pretty well. She is no fan of Toby's. He doesn't seem to have a major opinion of her. He saw another child in the house and his little doggy mind said "Ok." She flips out if she's in the high chair and he walks by where she can't see him. Can't blame her a bit. It will just take time. For now, we are easing into our new normal.

Home

Our last day in China was Friday. We went to some toy stores. I thought it would be like KB toys, because that's really all I know. The malls our guide took us too were ginormous, 8 stories high with hundreds and hundreds of stores. It was overwhelming. We got Noah a little police car and picked up some little toys for Talitha to help keep her occupied on the plane.

We also saw a famous Catholic church built by the French in the 1800's. I was always under the impression that the Chinese government didn't allow Christianity but that's not really the case. The government, we are told, allows any religions just monitors some closely.

I didn't bring my camera. No reason, just a doofus.

After the sightseeing, we packed up and spent the last hour in the executive lounge, eating fruit and stale cookies. Tali had a dirty diaper so I found a corner and changed her. Now here's a funny thing about China: there aren't many trash cans inside buildings. Every restaurant has lots of workers to clean up, you leave your stuff on the table at McDonald's. The hotel lobby did not have a trash can. The executive lounge did not either. So there I was with this diaper. I wandered around the hotel, holding someone else's poo and trying to act casual. I finally found a small one in the bathroom. Normalcy restored.

We got Talitha's visa around 330 pm and hopped in a van to Hong Kong. I showed our guide the name of the hotel on my reservation and he conferred with the driver to make sure he knew where it was. The traffic was the usual awful that we have come to expect in China. At one point there were 8 lanes going through a toll and they merged into 2 lanes. That was fun. Customs into Hong Kong went pretty fast. Our driver was bored with the whole process and texted during the checkpoint. When we got to Hong Kong the driver had no idea where the hotel was.

"Take your time, don't worry about us. We just spend 3 hours in this car feeding crackers to our baby so she won't cry. Please, drive as slowly as you want. We love this van. Let's stay forever."

We finally got to the hotel. The next morning, we got to the lounge right when it opened at 6 am so we could catch the 7 am bus to the airport. The guy in the lounge was still setting up for breakfast. It says something about your increasing level of snobbery when you're irritated that all you got for breakfast was a wide assortment of fresh cut fruit and pastries.

We packed up quickly and I couldn't find my deodorant anywhere. We had to leave though and I knew we weren't going to be home for about 30 hours so I took a swipe of Matt's deodorant. Although I didn't fully appreciate the extremely manly smell, I felt comforted by the words "Power Stripe" on the tube.

At the airport, we tried to get the person at the United counter to sit us all together. The kids and I were together but Matt was by himself. To his credit, he acted like he truly wanted to sit with us. The person at the United counter (Motto: Fly the Mediocre Skies) was adamant that they can't rearrange seats without asking people's permission. Talitha started crying and fussy and as I wrestled with her and imagined a 15 hour flight alone with the 2 kids I thought "Power Stripe my left foot."

We got on our flight no problem and even managed to get seated together. It was a long and tough flight, with one of us holding her wriggly self or walking her around most of the time. There was another adoptive family with their 2 year old on the flight and the mom told me she overhead a passenger complain about the babies (there were 4 total on the flight) to a flight attendant. The flight attendant responded "Yeah, they're getting on my nerves too."

You know, flying with small children is a tricky thing and your point of view changes depending on whether they are yours or not. If they are yours, you feel a righteous wrath and think "Hey, they deserve to fly too! Flying is tough for babies." If they are not, you feel a righteous wrath and think "Hey, I didn't pay to listen to some baby scream for 15 hours." What makes adoption tough is that you've only known your child for about 10 days. It was like playing that game with the timer and the little shapes that pop up unexpectedly - Pefection. We never knew quite what the problem was or what set her off. After awhile we turned on each other:

"Why did you make direct eye contact with her right foot? Now she's crying."
"Now you've set her off. You know she hates when you use the word 'the' yet you keep saying it."

Going through customs in Newark was pretty simple. We stood in line for awhile, constantly snaking our way to the front. There was a big tv with news playing and as we passed it, the anchor stated "Kindergartners getting the sex talk? How young is too young?" Jack turned to me and said "Mom, what's the sex talk?" Thanks for that, CNN.

An officer pulled us out of the line and two other adoptive families. He ran us through the little customs booth quickly and led us to a room. After a few minutes of him talking to other officers, he called us back up and gave us our children's passport and told us he didn't want us to wait in that room for 2 hours and we were all set to go.

It was an incredibly kind thing to do for families traveling with small kids after such a long flight. I'll never forget you, Officer Austin. In fact, I may name something after you. Not anything big, like a kid. Maybe a houseplant. Austin the cactus. I'll think of you when I water it. Although it is a cactus so it won't be too often but you just need to take what you can get.

We spent about 9 hours in the Newark airport before our flight to FL. By the time we boarded, Talitha was spent. She had reached her limit of planes and tiny little windows. She cried and then slept fitfully the last flight.

We finally got in around 12:45 am and took showers and ate a little something. We are very happy to be home and thankful for our friends and family in this difficult but amazing journey. More tomorrow on the transition home but I've got to get off the computer now. Kate and Noah will be here soon to meet Tali. I have nothing more funny or witty to end with. Jet lag makes me feel like there are marshmallows in my head. Or how I imagine that would feel.

China Day 12 - Almost the End

(Straight away I have to apologize. This post is a jumbled mix of what happened today and my thoughts. But it is my blog so you can accept my apology or not. I don't care.)

There are certain things that happen near the end of a long trip that signal it's time to go home.

Here are my signs:

1. My shave gel has lost the will to live:

2. My one and only hair elastic broke. Why did I only bring one? Was I afraid of the extra weight? What were you thinking, 2 weeks ago me? So I had to knot it together and now it's tiny. It only fits once around my hair and I'm terrified it will break again. It's so hot and humid that I have given up leaving my hair down. I want to apologize to those around me for my appearance but let's be honest, this is how I look almost all of the time anyway.

3. We are bribing Jack with money to swim laps in the pool. He has little bursts of energy in the hotel room that no amount of evil eye will abate.

Even as I type this, I think of another adoptive mom I recently met. As she was telling me how they have experienced vomiting, diarrhea, pink eye, and other such horrors, it made my problems seems pretty darn small. Their 2 year old had explosive diarrhea all over the mom on a bus. And here I am, near tears that my Walmart can of shave gel busted.

On to the events of today. We had our US consulate appointment today. A lot of adoptive families wear patriotic colors and get their picture taken by the sign outside. I made sure everyone had on their 'Merica outfits and I even threw on some mascara and off we went. We didn't even take the stupid picture. No time before and our guide was off and running afterward. It's probably just as well. Like a dunderhead, I washed my nude colored bra last night and only had my black bra, which is hard to hide with my spaghetti strap dress and white sheer cardigan. Then again, nothing says "I'm free" like showing off your straps.

In the car ride after the appointment, Talitha had a meltdown. Screaming, crying, arching her little back. It was like trying to cradle Linda Blair in the backseat. At one point, Matt laid her on the seat between him and Jack and Jack exclaimed "Why did you lay the screaming head near me?"

This does not bode well for our upcoming 15 hour flight.

Later on in the day we took a walk down the street and I bought a jade bracelet. The girl selling it and I bartered back and forth on the calculator over the price. At one point, she rubbed the bracelet on the concrete. I took that as a good sign that the bracelet was quality. Or perhaps it was a signal to the other peddlers that I was a pretty gullible idiot and to grab my attention because I will surely buy overpriced things from them also.

Right after that, we were walking back to the hotel and Matt dropped a dollar from his pocket. It picked up the wind a bit and he scurried back the sidewalk to retrieve it. It was 20 yen, which is like 3 bucks. I harassed him about letting go of the stroller to get 3 bucks. When we reached the elevator, a hotel employee was standing by to lead us to an open one. I wondered if this was his only job. I told Matt he probably waits for the Americans, perhaps assuming that we are too stupid to figure out which elevator is open. Matt replied "You bought a bracelet because it was rubbed on the ground." I then stated that he left our child on the street to run after 3 bucks. We probably could use someone to lead us right to our hotel room and open the door for us as well.

Over the week we've been here, we've befriended a young Egyptian women we see often at dinner. She's a teacher and tried really hard to be friends with Jack, although he is a fickle companion to adults at times. This evening she was showing Jack his name and his siblings name in Arabic and he was asking her questions about Egypt. He asked her about pyramids and whether there was still a pharaoh. She asked him how he knew those things about Egypt. I was expecting him to say something like "My dear mother has taught me so many wonderful things" or "We read about things all over the world, my mother wants us to be cultured." And then I planned to shyly duck my head in humility and act like I was simply doing my duty as a parent.

He then told her that he saw it in a movie, The Prince of Egypt.

I'm surprised he didn't add something like "We watch it while eating cake and cleaning our pistols. My mom leaves us at home while she plays the slots."

She kept trying to give Jack hugs and kisses, which was an affront to the massive amounts of testosterone coursing through his manly veins. She had to settle for a quick hug and a handshake.

Good gravy, is my face that shiny? Note to self: Blot.

She talked a lot about the political unrest in her country. And then she kept inviting us to Egypt. I'm a bit suspicious. "Come to my beautiful country! You will not die. Probably."

Tomorrow we leave for Hong Kong and then to the airport Saturday. Almost home!

China Day 11 - A Very Strange Lunch Indeed

We walked around Guangzhou ourselves today (without our guide, I mean). Walking into one of the clothing stores, a woman got my attention and said "You Monica? You Monica?"

No, but I could see how you mistook me for Courtney Cox. Happens all the time.

After a couple seconds of me grinning like an idiot, my brain kicked in and I realized that she was asking if I was American.

Oh...um, yeah. That too.

We went to lunch off the recommendation of someone on my adoption group. It was called Honey Go and had an outline of a dog next to the name of the restaurant. Needless to say, we walked in with no trepidation at all.

The menu had a bunch of unrelated things on it: Udon noodles, spaghetti, pork chops, fried rice, etc. That's never a good sign. It means the restaurant can't commit to anything and the result is that nothing is good. We got three glasses of tepid water placed before us, one with what looked like a piece of rice floating in it. They were pushed to the end of the table pretty fast, so no one (meaning Jack) took a sip without thinking about it.

I got spaghetti with cheese, which meant a piece of American cheese placed on top. Matt got fish. It came with a little pile of spaghetti and a poorly fried egg. To fancy things up, a little cherry tomato was placed in the corner of the plate, crudely cut into a flower by whom I can only assume is the cook's toddler.

Matt was satisfied with this face so here it is. Also, please appreciate the tomato. Someone
put the bare minimum amount of effort into it.

The Coke was the best part. Perfectly chilled.

We played a game of Go Fish while waiting for our food and during that time, a couple with a baby sat down next to us. The man spoke a little English so we talked about our little ones. After chit chat for a few minutes, he points to Talitha and says "She looks like Chinese baby."

Son of a gun, you're right.

He was nothing if not astute. Matt told me after we left that he should have slowly turned to me and said with a hint of anger "She does look Chinese."

Well, I did go to Chinatown once and it was awfully dark...

After a nap and some pool time, we headed out again. The people who clean the streets here wear these traditional Chinese peasant hats. That just seems like rubbing it in.

"Clean up the trash and make sure you wear a peasant hat while you're at it. Don't even think about a baseball cap."

So that basically our day. Here are a few funny things that were said today:

This morning I told Matt I was having cramps. Jack quickly said "Hey, can I have one too?"

Matt and Jack were joking around and Jack said "Where did you come from?"

Matt shot back "Your mom."

After a second he realized how terrifically awkward that statement was and we laughed for awhile about it. Jack was quick to point out which mom Matt actually came from. 

China Day 10 - Baby Shoes and Fashion Horror

We went to a local tourist place, Shaiman Island. Our guide told us it's manmade and was created during the British and French colony period, which explains why it looks so Western. Our guide explained that at one point, Guangzhou was the only area of China that was open to outsiders, therefore it became quite rich. It is still busy with import/export businesses. It was a beautiful spot and reminded us of Charleston or Savannah.

This is a famous sculpture. People take pictures of their kids in the space where Jack is. She wasn't happy with being put down though.

We looked around at the local shops and got some "squeaky shoes," which are leather baby shoes with a little squeaky thing in the heel. You can bet your sweet bippy we'll be taking those out soon. The smallest size they had was a 2, which was a little big lengthwise but good enough. It's a little pink sandal with a strap across the foot. The strap is made for a fatter foot and the result is almost comical.

There were statues all around and wedding pictures being taken and tai chi being performed all over.

Matt showed Jack how to pose for a picture with these statues of musicians. He was less than amused to find out I took his instead.

We found this track in the middle of the walkways and of course, Jack took off like a shot, running back and forth on the lane. Only a kid.

Next our guide took us to a local market. Dried things of all sorts. Our guide laughed and told us that the strangest thing was the dried penises. Deer, cow. All sorts of animals. Matt remarked that we are looking for a gift for our parents. Perhaps you could add some twine and pesto! You have yourself a very unique Christmas tree ornament. Or you could get a bunch and make a wreath. It would be all over Pinterest in a matter of days.

Bag o' penises

We asked what they were used for (I was thinking a Manhood Stew or something). He said you put it in wine and drink it and it's supposed to help your performance. It seems like it would be a shameful thing to buy, like Viagra. Men quietly remarking to the clerk "Could you please put a couple in a brown bag?" 

Tubs of scorpions.

We got Subway sandwiches and went back to our hotel room. After Talitha's nap, we headed out to explore the area around our hotel. 

We found this "fashion" section of the city. A bunch of malls in a row. It was really odd, though. There were a bunch of clothing stores but nothing like we have here. Every piece of clothing was individual. They didn't have a bunch of clothes in certain styles but in different sizes. It was just a bunch of weird clothes thrown together.

Also, almost all the stores were vacant. It was a little creepy with the music playing overhead. Like a scene in a horror movie.

I can't even begin to describe the horrific awesomeness of this outfit. Check out the leggings. The cat eyes were glittering with sequins. And desperation.

Don't step on my what?!? I want to take a sharpie to this shirt so badly my fingers twitch.

There was this Ronald sitting outside the mall on a bench. We didn't see a McDonald's. It was like Big Brother. Chinese Ronald is more bizarre than American Ronald.

In your face, Starbucks.

All sorts of street vendors. Mmm...salmonella.

I think we'll definitely check it out more tomorrow. I do miss my other two (oh how I want to squish Noah and give Katie a kiss!) and can't wait to be home. But I'm enjoy my time in this fascinating country, or at least this teeny little corner I'm in. 

We went to dinner at our hotel's lounge tonight and were unfortunately caught in the crossfires of an pompous monologue. This guy behind us started yammering away and in the space of 10 minutes, we heard the following topics covered by one man: Martin Luther, first class, parenting, Alzheimer's, respect, and a bunch of things that have fallen completely out of my brain. He just loudly talked and talked with no regard to anyone trying to enjoy dinner around him.

At one point he was recounting a story about a water basin that broke and he exclaimed loudly "I couldn't find any tools! There were no tools to be found!"

I leaned in close to Matt and whispered "There's a tool right here."

As we walked out, we noticed his companion - eyes glassy with boredom, head slightly nodding every few seconds. We didn't hear a word from him. Give that guy a medal for remarkable endurance with a me monster.

I leave you with a few shots today of our sweet youngest daughter.